A few weeks (cough, ahem, MONTHS) had passed since I cleaned out my pantry. Who has the energy for this task when I am constantly wiping up teensy crumbs and cups of spilled red juice off my freshly mopped floor? Things were piling up on the shelves and it was a hot mess in there. Cans were mixed with the cereal boxes, spices were in the wrong place, and I'm pretty sure 1/2 a bottle of syrup had exploded somewhere on the floor that I hadn't been able to see in several weeks. It was embarrassing. No problem; I can just shut the door of that messy closet and no one will know it looks like World War III in there. The only issue with my strategy? Something was starting to smell. I'm not talking a, "Hmm, I wonder what that odor could be?" smell; it was a "Holy mother of Abraham Lincoln, what is that?" stench. The aroma of death attacked my nostrils every time I opened that door. I had no idea where the smell was coming from; it was going to require me to empty out my entire pantry to find the culprit, and ain't nobody got time for that. I continued to shut the door, especially when guests came over; the offensive "perfume" was contained as long as the pantry door was closed.
One afternoon, I walked into my home after picking up my son from preschool, and the smell had started to permeate the whole house. I dry heaved as I started lighting every candle I owned, but it was no use. I was going to have to face this unpleasant task with the added bonus of inhaling vomit-inducing fumes.
After several minutes of emptying the pantry, I found the culprit: a forgotten bag of potatoes that had started to ferment. It. Was. Nasty. Not only had roots started growing out of each potato, but liquid was puddled at the bottom of the bag. It was my very own homemade vodka. The cloudy liquid was seeping out of the bag and onto my floor and other food items touching it. I quickly threw this sack and everything touching it away. After finding the root of the problem, it was much easier to figure out what I had to do. I dried up the "vodka" and sanitized the floor. I organized shelves. I made sure everything was in plain sight; I was not going to make the mistake again of keeping things so messy that items lay in there hidden and forgotten.
I started thinking about that hidden sack of rotting potatoes and how it is so much like hidden sin in our lives. In her Bible study Stuck, Jennie Allen says, "We deal with the big, showy, obvious sin that everyone sees, but the invisible stuff is trickier, sneakier, deadlier." It is much easier for us to wipe away the crumbs and red juice that obviously trash our spiritual floor. We know to avoid the sins that everyone can see: murder, drunkenness, adultery, etc. Our exterior is kept pristine because it is what is visible, and we want others to think that we have it all together. But, what is lurking beyond the surface? The very thing you think no one sees and no one smells. If left unchecked, it can permeate every crevice of your soul until it is obvious that something stinks. No matter how many doors you close.
Hidden sin comes in many shapes and forms. Pride, idolatry, greed, envy, arrogance, jealousy, lust, evil desires, anger, and resentment are all examples of sin that burrows deep within and starts fermenting our souls. I have found that most of the sin the Bible talks about is the kind we can keep private and concealed. I believe this is the case because covert sin is the most destructive. It penetrates our very core, steals our joy, and saturates our mind with negativity. Since we battle these sins alone, we suffer in solitude.
Sometimes we suffer the horrible smell of hidden sin and have to dig deep in our heart to find the culprit. David wrote in Psalms 19:12-13,
"How can I know all the sins lurking in my heart? Cleanse me from these hidden faults. Keep your servant from deliberate sins! Don't let them control me. Then I will be free of guilt and innocent of great sin."
I was challenged by my women's life group to identify idols in my life. I pictured people kneeling and bowing down before a golden statue and trusting in graven images or praying to other gods. Based on that definition, I didn't have any idols; this was not an issue for me. As I started to search my heart, however, I realized that an idol is anything that takes our focus off God and places them elsewhere. I suffered feelings of fear and felt overwhelmed when something was out of my control or comfort zone. I suddenly found my rotten sack of potatoes: I was putting the god of my comfort over the God of my life. Eek. It smelled. My fear of confronting my fermenting sack had caused me to resist living completely abandoned to the will of God. It affected every thought, action, and inaction in my life and I could no longer cover it up. After I identified the source of my issue, the only thing left to do was repent and throw that stinky mess away. In Colossians 3:5, the Bible says:
"So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you..."
By putting to death my hidden sin of idolatry, I could start to sanitize and clean up the wreckage it had left behind. I am on the road to freedom.
Let's not get so caught up in our outer self that we neglect the pantry of our soul; while people may look at our outward appearance, God looks at our heart (I Samuel 16:7). No amount of shutting doors or pretending it doesn't exist will make it go away. It takes a proactive approach to find the culprit causing havoc. Don't let the smell fester; there is freedom and cleansing that comes from cleaning out the pantry.
This is great! Such a perfect analogy!
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